Friends

Friends. How many can we have in a lifetime and what do we do to keep them in our lives. As I have mentioned before I graduated in 1985 from Wayne Memorial High School with an awesome group of people.

Now I do admit, there are many people I do not remember their names but a lot I do. There are some people from high school that I cannot believe I have let our friendship fall by the wayside.

I just got home from the bar. Since joining Facebook I have enjoyed connecting with people I have not spoken to in years. A group of us decided to meet for some drinks. I was a little nervous about going. I do not look the same as I did in high school and as mentioned in an earlier blog, all those feelings of insecurity start coming out of hiding from the deepest part of my being.

But I had an absolutely awesome time. I miss these people so much. It is too bad our lives are filled with so much obligation that we do not have the time to really nurture these friendships.

I think too often in my life I have been so protective of revealing who I am that I have missed out on a lot. It is such a good feeling to just "let it all hang out". The older I get the more I realize how alike each member of the human species is. I truly do care about these people and wish I had not let so many years slip by.

Thanks friends, for loving me as I am.

Looking for time!

I have been sitting at the computer for the last hour reading blogs, updating my status on Facebook, reading people's walls, etc. The whole evening I have been complaining about how much I have to do and how overwhelmed I am. What the hell am I doing then?

Do you ever feel like things would be great if you could just have an evening with absolutely nothing to do except sit and read or watch tv? I feel that way a lot. But whenever I get an opportunity like that I totally waste it. Do I really want an evening like that or am I just looking for a reason to complain. I don't think I know how to relax.

High School Feelings

About a month ago I joined Facebook and have connected with a lot of people from high school. Even after 23 years it is amazing how people basically remain the same.

I really enjoy peeking at it every day to see how people are doing. Some of the people I truly miss and cannot believe we did not have a closer connection throughout the many years since.

Some days it feels like it was yesterday.

What truly amazes me is that I still have deep rooted feelings that still come to the surface. I think I was a pretty well adjusted teenager. I had a lot of friends a a few best friends. But I have spent many years working on my self confidence. I always had a tendency to care too much about what others thought of me. I thought I was past all that but when looking at everyones Facebook I have a nagging feeling that I still care how I am perceived.

Damn! After all this time I should really not give a shit.